Rules

Made a decision yesterday. After a bit of counsel from a co-worker that happens to have a PhD in therapy and a life of experience in relationship management. I found a path that I felt was acceptable after having lost control of the situation that nearly broke me into pieces and made me absolutely nucking futs for a few weeks. Not that I ever want to be labeled an anal freak and schedule time with someone, but I decided on a schedule of contact or attempted contact where JM is concerned. Call twice a week on Mondays and Thursdays around 5 PM. If he doesn't answer, leave a message as a reminder that I'm still here, still thinking of him and still trying to hang onto hope of some kind. After sorting that out in my head yesterday and following the advice of an office mate, I feel relieved. JM's response was a few IMs while I slept last night, knowing full-well that I was already in bed. It doesn't matter. I have his attention. I will not chase what will run as fast or faster as I can go. I don't want to be like the ex-stalker-girlfriend who violated the poor man's personal space and safety mechanisms. He's lost that bit of control in his life, so I understand the need to have ALL the shots called by him and him alone. It's a terribly frightening place in life to be when stuff like that happens. Scary! Alas, my lunch is almost over and this is me talking out loud and attempting to make some sense out of the mysteries of relationships. Fun stuff!

Tammolly ~ Still breathing.

...So if I die today I'll be the happy phantom
And I'll go wearin' my naughties like a jewel...
I'm still an angel to a girl who hates to sin